Our Marriage

I have a really awful memory. Like so bad that I can't remember what I did yesterday. So I thought it'd be nice for me to have a little note of my favorite memories during the process of us getting married. Something to look back on sort of thing. :)

Before Wedding
  • Calling everyone the day we got engaged and their reactions (most notably, Cuong and Jaymik).
  • The two bachelorette parties with my favorite people, the amazing wedding shower thrown by our wedding party, my work bridal shower, and the lovely tea dinner hosted by Barb. So grateful for all the wonderful people around us.
  • There was a moment the week before getting married where my sister and mom thought they wouldn't see me until the day of. We were standing in the middle of the street saying goodbye to each other. Right there in the middle of the street with the three of us hugging, my sister starting sobbing "my baby sister is getting married!"
  • When we arrived at the court to get our marriage license, I had brought the wrong form so we had to rush back home to get it. There was only about ten minutes left before the County Clerk closed and we were barely going to make it. Kyle was speeding (which is unlike him) so that we could hopefully make it on time, but then we saw flashing lights behind us. We were stopped by a police officer for speeding which led to uncontrollable crying on my part. He came up to our car, let us go and told us to just be careful and that we could still make it on time. We barely made it but sure enough, got our marriage license. The rest of the day was a perfect dinner and ice cream date to celebrate.
  • After losing both our cars, all the calls from loved ones offering help.
  • Spending time with everyone during the rehearsal dinner and the amazing speeches by Cuong, Raul, Helena, and Rasy. Also seeing Rasy cry during his speech. :)

Wedding Day
  • My sister coming in to see me right before I had to walk down the aisle. I was so nervous and when she came in, my whole body was shaking. She said she just wanted to make sure I was ok and to of course, also take a picture. ;)
  • After seeing Kyle and crying in front of everyone, my mom coming up to hand me a tissue.
  • Deacon Randy explaining that before the ceremony, he asked Kyle if he was ready and Kyle responded with "since the day I met her."
  • Making eye contact with Chris Lew while he was reading 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. "Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
  • Marrying Kyle
  • Finding out from Kyle that my dad had come in to spend time with him and all the groomsmen before the ceremony started.
  • While hiding with Kyle behind a door at the side of the church afterwards, looking outside to see Aunt Cindy sneakily snapping pictures of us.
  • The amazing speeches from Michael, Lindley, and Rochelle.
  • After all our practice, finally getting to do our first dance. Then seeing our incredible teacher, Chris Lew, crying in a corner once we finished. I think/hope we made him proud.
  • Cake, ALWAYS THE CAKE. But really the Big Foot cake by Linda was so amazing and delicious!
  • ALL THE DANCING! Turn down for what!
  • Seeing my nephews and Emily dancing, too cute. Also toward the end when Kyle and I were dancing with the kids, my aunt, uncle, and cousins (who were sitting down the entire time) came up, grabbed our hands, and joined us!
  • My dance with my dad and also Grandpa Schafer. I love them.
  • Courtney catching the bouquet, woot woot!
  • The after party but mostly getting to eat all the leftovers and cake! ;)

After Wedding
  • Getting to sleep in with Kyle at the hotel. Waking up to my husband.
  • Wearing my very first ao dai for a special dinner my mom hosted with all our family and friends.
  • The amazing speeches from my family and especially my sister's speech welcoming Kyle to the family. There was a lot of crying that night.
  • The late night chat with Grandma Kirk and Barb, my other mommy.
  • The honeymoon.
  • The marriage.

Marriage

I'm scared of marriage. It's really terrifying promising the rest of your life to someone. Not because you're with that person forever but knowing that this person will know you at your worse. For us, it was never perfect. It was never easy. We don't fight often but when we do, it's like a hurricane passing through a small town. We can say such hurtful things to each other and there were days where I wasn't sure if we would make it. I had doubts but Kyle never did. He continues to love and support me even though I am so flawed. He continues to fight for us when I lose my way. And those days when I don't want to fight anymore and I am mean and terrible to him, he says "I love you more and more each day. I will never give up on you."

And he never did and despite it all, we're still together. And tomorrow is our wedding day.

Kyle, I love you. You have taught me so much about love and marriage. You have taught me what is most important. That life and people are imperfect but love is what keeps the marriage going. That love isn't a situation but an indescribable and unrelenting certainty that this person is worth it. To be positive and understand that things will not always go the way we want it and to not to let the bad moments overshadow the good ones. As we approach tomorrow, I just want you to know that I don't care about the wedding. I look forward to our marriage together. I look forward to the greatest adventure we will ever commit our lives to, because I know that you're the one for me. You are so worth it. I promise I will never give up on you and do my best to always work on our marriage and to make you happy. I know there will be many more hurdles to face, but we will overcome them together. Here's to an imperfect but long and loving marriage together. I can't wait to be your wife.